The next goal was to cover up the panther.
Since it was so large, I’d been told by every tattooist I’d been to that it couldn’t be done. I was on the verge of giving up when I met Keller at a tattoo shop in New Port Richey.
The panther was on my left shoulder, now under the angel side of my girls. I know, you can’t see any trace of it…that’s how awesome Keller is.
So my decision to put this tattoo on my shoulders is steeped in a lot of symbolism. The first reason I got these girls was because I wanted to celebrate my duality. I know we all have many sides that make us the complete being we are, but I’ve lived a lifetime of trying to embrace and understand my duality. My good side, my bad side, my enlightened side, my residing in the dark side, my black side, my white side, my feminine side, my masculine side and it goes on and on. I chose to have the angel on my left shoulder, the side my heart resides on. I feel the good in me, the woman of integrity, love, and compassion is very much wrapped around my heart. The devil side of me resides on the right side, my strong side, the side that I use to function in life, eating, writing, etc. That is the side of me that has had to emerge repeatedly in order to make it through the ongoing tough times.
The second reason I got “the girls” is because I wanted desperately to embrace the feminine I continuously hid away, the vulnerable side of myself. I have made a point of keeping that part of myself protected from harm. That decision has its upside and downside.
Again, the panther will always be there, yet another scar, another horrible reminder of past troubles. The panther is forever hidden by the angel, the part of me that has forgiven.